Every day it seems like i have been getting up and ready earlier and earlier to go to the NICU to see if my little one can come home sooner than later. Today was one of those days that I thought maybe today is the day... if anything, he would come home at night. I was wrong. I waited for hours with my little hungry and gassy baby (this is nothing new, he has always been gassy- takes after his daddy i guess :-P) until the Dr came and made rounds. I asked when the baby would be coming home- hoping it would be tonight, but Dr said that tomorrow is the day if there are no "episodes" over night.
I am getting tired of hearing the word 'episode'... its all I hear and it is all the nurses tell the parents on the phone or when they see them. It must be the way that they were trained but I have come to realize that some nurses are just cold bitter people and others really care about taking care of their patients- other peoples kids. It must be hard looking after three or four crying babies for hours on end when they have all these special needs and medicines, each being hooked up to individual monitors which chime simultaneously driving whoever is in the room crazy until they stop. Those nurses are saints, because being in there for over a month and seeing what goes on, I am not sure I would be able to handle it. I did notice that some nurses don't even hear the chimes anymore because they are so used to them which is not good. One word of advice: Talk to every nurse you can and get information out of them... like how much they know about your babys health even though they say to check with he Dr... ask what different words mean and really listen to them. Yesterday I had asked the difference between the numbers on the monitors and I got a half hour lecture on why the first is different from the third, what the second means and why if the first and last number get too high or low it can mean something bad. All these things to think about and it makes me stress out knowing I cannot rely on a monitor when he comes home because I will not have one there!
I have noticed that my little man has developed a bigger appetite in the last couple of days. There is a pattern when he eats. He eats till he feels like he has to burp, then while you are burping him he either tries to sleep or push something out the other end, then after trying to burp him, he either eats more from his bottle or refuses to eat till its warmed up or he feels hungry again. He really knows what he wants and I have to cater to him to get him to eat. I must admit, I really don't mind doing it because I don't want him to starve and since he is my first I know I can spoil him a little bit.
Since he was up the whole time I was with him this morning, I feel like I need to take a cat nap before I go back to see him. I will let you know what happens when I go to see him later this afternoon!
-J
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Baby discharge and brady episodes
I just want to say thank you for all the comments that I have been getting... your feedback is great and I can't tell you how much I appreciate everything that I am getting back from everyone!
This weekend was super busy and we did not get to see the baby as much as we had hoped. I feel like I spent hours in Buy Buy Baby and Target only to find a few select things I had chosen from the registry. We also spent hours cleaning the apartment from top to bottom while taking time off to fix our cars and visit with some family members for a little bit. My life seems so much busier after having the baby and he is not even home yet!
Well, when I called the hospital to check up on the little one on Sunday I was told that he might be able to come home Monday... he didn't. The Dr who was checking his chart on Sunday said everything looked great and that he could be discharged. I was very happy to hear that so when I got to the NICU on Monday morning I was very upset to hear that he would not be coming home now till maybe Thursday. Apparently he had an "episode" Saturday night while he was sleeping where his heart rate went really low (lower than it should have gone), but he recovered within a few seconds. The Dr said it is nothing to really panic about but it is something to keep an eye on. Even though I want him home now, I know that it is good for him to be there a few extra days instead of having a bigger episode at home. It is for the best.
As we cleaned the apartament the other night, it made me realize how much babies need. Most of the closet is filled with baby stuff and my boyfriend and I have a very small space on either side of the little ones for our stuff. He also has his cradle, a dresser/changing table and will be getting shelving units to hold his toys, books and other stuff. He has taken over. I am ok with it all because I know my little man will be home soon. That makes me happy.
I do have a few more things to do before he gets home and I had better get going so I can finish. I just left the hospital a little bit ago to eat and run errands so I better hop to it! I will give you another update on how everything is soon!
-J
This weekend was super busy and we did not get to see the baby as much as we had hoped. I feel like I spent hours in Buy Buy Baby and Target only to find a few select things I had chosen from the registry. We also spent hours cleaning the apartment from top to bottom while taking time off to fix our cars and visit with some family members for a little bit. My life seems so much busier after having the baby and he is not even home yet!
Well, when I called the hospital to check up on the little one on Sunday I was told that he might be able to come home Monday... he didn't. The Dr who was checking his chart on Sunday said everything looked great and that he could be discharged. I was very happy to hear that so when I got to the NICU on Monday morning I was very upset to hear that he would not be coming home now till maybe Thursday. Apparently he had an "episode" Saturday night while he was sleeping where his heart rate went really low (lower than it should have gone), but he recovered within a few seconds. The Dr said it is nothing to really panic about but it is something to keep an eye on. Even though I want him home now, I know that it is good for him to be there a few extra days instead of having a bigger episode at home. It is for the best.
As we cleaned the apartament the other night, it made me realize how much babies need. Most of the closet is filled with baby stuff and my boyfriend and I have a very small space on either side of the little ones for our stuff. He also has his cradle, a dresser/changing table and will be getting shelving units to hold his toys, books and other stuff. He has taken over. I am ok with it all because I know my little man will be home soon. That makes me happy.
I do have a few more things to do before he gets home and I had better get going so I can finish. I just left the hospital a little bit ago to eat and run errands so I better hop to it! I will give you another update on how everything is soon!
-J
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Preemie and anxiety
As I sit in the hospital cafe, I can't help but think about everything the nurse and Dr had told me this morning. The nurse gave me the rundown of what I should do before the baby comes home. Mind you, it is Thursday, and I was told that the baby would be coming home on Tuesday. I'm thinking about all I have to do and panic a little. Why you ask? Well, I have never taken care of a newborn by myself that was born premature! Last night was the first time I was able to give the little guy a bath and today was the first day I have ever tried breast feeding, but more about that later.
So anyway, the nurse not only asked who the baby's Dr would be, what I should say to make the appointments, but she told me about the car seat challenge, asked me if I wanted the pictures done at the hospital of the baby, asked if my boyfriend and I will be rooming in before the baby goes home and asked why I have never breast fed before. It was a long list of stuff she was going over with me and I am sure that I forgot one or two things she talked about. I never realized there was so much to do before baby comes home, partially because I would have had the shower first, have time to prep for baby then have the baby. All the prep when I had the urge to 'nest'.
So now I have all these things to talk about with my boyfriend with hopes of not stressing him out. Slowly we have been trying to prepare by washing his clothes and the cradle linens, buy diapers and wipes and all the other essentials for a new baby. We still need a changing table, more blankets, bottles and other stuff I can't remember right now. The list is too long!
Ok, so breast feeding. That was an adventure. I didn't know what to expect at first and really didn't realize how much work it really is! The lactation consultant came by to help me and she told me preemie feeding is different from a full term baby feed. Since my little boy has just gotten used to the bottle, the LC said it might be more difficult. She helped me position him and my hand/breast accordingly. You have to pay attention with a preemie too because they are so small you have to make sure they remember to breathe. So without going into too much detail, I got the hang of it and the baby eventually calmed down and got the hang of it as well. He was then supposed to eat from his bottle in case he didn't get enough, but kept pushing it away. I guess we will see if he gains or loses weight to determine if he's getting enough.
Pretty exciting day so far and its only the afternoon. I breast fed twice, found out he's coming home soon, and have realized how much I have to do this weekend to get the house ready for him! I'm trying not to stress too much, but the more I think about it, the more I stress.
Its starting to rain and since I don't have a watch, I'm wondering what time it is and if the baby is awake. I will keep you posted on everything that goes on. Feel free to comment and share your experiences- it would be great to compare notes.
Ciao!
-J
So anyway, the nurse not only asked who the baby's Dr would be, what I should say to make the appointments, but she told me about the car seat challenge, asked me if I wanted the pictures done at the hospital of the baby, asked if my boyfriend and I will be rooming in before the baby goes home and asked why I have never breast fed before. It was a long list of stuff she was going over with me and I am sure that I forgot one or two things she talked about. I never realized there was so much to do before baby comes home, partially because I would have had the shower first, have time to prep for baby then have the baby. All the prep when I had the urge to 'nest'.
So now I have all these things to talk about with my boyfriend with hopes of not stressing him out. Slowly we have been trying to prepare by washing his clothes and the cradle linens, buy diapers and wipes and all the other essentials for a new baby. We still need a changing table, more blankets, bottles and other stuff I can't remember right now. The list is too long!
Ok, so breast feeding. That was an adventure. I didn't know what to expect at first and really didn't realize how much work it really is! The lactation consultant came by to help me and she told me preemie feeding is different from a full term baby feed. Since my little boy has just gotten used to the bottle, the LC said it might be more difficult. She helped me position him and my hand/breast accordingly. You have to pay attention with a preemie too because they are so small you have to make sure they remember to breathe. So without going into too much detail, I got the hang of it and the baby eventually calmed down and got the hang of it as well. He was then supposed to eat from his bottle in case he didn't get enough, but kept pushing it away. I guess we will see if he gains or loses weight to determine if he's getting enough.
Pretty exciting day so far and its only the afternoon. I breast fed twice, found out he's coming home soon, and have realized how much I have to do this weekend to get the house ready for him! I'm trying not to stress too much, but the more I think about it, the more I stress.
Its starting to rain and since I don't have a watch, I'm wondering what time it is and if the baby is awake. I will keep you posted on everything that goes on. Feel free to comment and share your experiences- it would be great to compare notes.
Ciao!
-J
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Preemie Hearing and Vision
In the past couple of days my little boy has grown from three to four pounds, has put on some baby fat that is very noticeable, and has had his hearing and eye tests done. It was interesting to watch the hearing test being done and I was happy to see that my little one did not squirm and try to pull out all of the wires and tubing from his head. I was very impressed by the girls who did the test. They were very gentle with him and explained everything they were doing to him (they did this because I kept asking questions!). They had three different wires with sticky pads on the end of them which were placed behind his ears and the last was put on his forehead. They put a little tube in his ear (not too far in, but enough that it would stay) and hit a button on the computer. From there we watched the screen as red and green lines were drawn on the monitor mimicking the format they have below showing "perfect hearing". The little sticky pads pick up his brain waves and thats how they measure how well he responds to sound. Its very cool to see being done because up to that point I really didn't know how well he could or could not hear and that scared me. I'm happy now because I know his hearing is good.
I was not there for the vision test because the Dr comes early in the morning to do the exam, and I was not up at the time he was there...its the time that normal people sleep. From what I hear the Dr has the nurse put in three sets of drops to dialate the eyes and then looks at the back of the eye to see how much blood flow he is getting to his retina. The nurse said everything looked good and that he needs a follow up in a few weeks. There is always going to be a slew of
follow up appointments when your baby is preemie.
So good news!!! He is up to four pounds and not only can I see his cheeks are chubbier, but he is hurting my arms a little because I am not used to this new weight. It's not like he weighs a lot but I have gotten so used to holding this little tiny peanut and now that peanut is growing and I have to adjust. The preemie clothes that we have are still very loose on him, but the length fits great. I am wondering what we can bring him home in... I have no cute outfits that are that small!
I have been getting very antsy because when I spoke to the Dr over the weekend, he said my baby will be able to come home in a week to ten days depending on how he does with his feedings. He has been eating with a bottle for every other feeding and with the feeding tube for the rest. Depending on the nurse on duty, sometimes we get to do a bottle feeding for two or three feedings in a row! That is very exciting for a mommy with a preemie... it means that we are THAT much closer to having the baby home! Seems like all we have left to do is bottle feed for each feed and pass the Car Seat Challenge!!! It doesn't seem that hard... it just takes up time. I will let you know how it goes!
-J
I was not there for the vision test because the Dr comes early in the morning to do the exam, and I was not up at the time he was there...its the time that normal people sleep. From what I hear the Dr has the nurse put in three sets of drops to dialate the eyes and then looks at the back of the eye to see how much blood flow he is getting to his retina. The nurse said everything looked good and that he needs a follow up in a few weeks. There is always going to be a slew of
follow up appointments when your baby is preemie.
So good news!!! He is up to four pounds and not only can I see his cheeks are chubbier, but he is hurting my arms a little because I am not used to this new weight. It's not like he weighs a lot but I have gotten so used to holding this little tiny peanut and now that peanut is growing and I have to adjust. The preemie clothes that we have are still very loose on him, but the length fits great. I am wondering what we can bring him home in... I have no cute outfits that are that small!
I have been getting very antsy because when I spoke to the Dr over the weekend, he said my baby will be able to come home in a week to ten days depending on how he does with his feedings. He has been eating with a bottle for every other feeding and with the feeding tube for the rest. Depending on the nurse on duty, sometimes we get to do a bottle feeding for two or three feedings in a row! That is very exciting for a mommy with a preemie... it means that we are THAT much closer to having the baby home! Seems like all we have left to do is bottle feed for each feed and pass the Car Seat Challenge!!! It doesn't seem that hard... it just takes up time. I will let you know how it goes!
-J
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Early Labor and NICU life
Ok, so the first day I decided to blog, I didn't think it would be the last day of my pregnancy. Yep, that's right... at 31 weeks I gave birth- that's why I haven't blogged in a while. I had an emergency c-section because the placenta was pulling away from my uterus and I began to hemmorage and go into labor- FUN STUFF. Not really, the whole thing was quite scary and it just so happens that the thing I did not want to get (the c-section) was the thing that I had to get. If the baby was laying in a position that allowed me to give birth naturally, then I would have, but the baby was transverse (laying across my belly) so they had to cut him out of me.
I must admit that that night everything was so surreal. By the time the Dr came in, got the low down on what was going on with me and the baby, and then decided we had to get the baby out because of his heart rate going down, I was already out of it. I don't know if it was lack of sleep, shock or if my mommy mode set in, but all I know is that I wanted to hear that baby cry and get out of me safely.
Everything happens so fast... they wheel you in, give you the epidural which kicks in pretty fast, cut you open, pull out the kid and sew you back up before you even realize that you are in the recovery room. I had even told my boyfriend that I don't remember getting from the OR to recovery then up to my room... all I remember is that I was a miserable mess that couldn't walk down to see my baby. That's all I wanted to do but I wasn't allowed till I was able to stand up.
Six PM I was allowed to see the baby which wouldn't have been so bad if I gave birth later than 4:13 AM. I spent all day crying because everyone that came to visit would get to see him and come back and say "oh he's so beautiful... you should see him". That was what made me so miserable. It did make me feel better to know that I was the first person besides the Dr and nurses to hold him for the first two days. He is the most beautiful baby I have ever laid eyes on, and still... after 20+ days I get teary eyed when looking at him because I can not believe that something to small and perfectly complete came out of me. At 2 pounds 11.4 ounces my little boy stole my heart and I fell in love. It's that mommy love... that's all I can say about it.
Since my discharge date, I have been in the hospital every day for several hours spending time with my baby. I have seen him smile and cry, have seen him move from a c-pap, to a high then to a low nasal cannula and now to just breathing room air. He has been gaining weight and is almost up to four pounds and is trying to keep up his own body temperature. All he has to do is master bottle feeding and then he will be out of the NICU!!
So far, the birth of my son has been an adventure. It started out crazy and has been going back to normal as the days go on. I can't wait to have him home with me- then I will really feel like a mom. It's hard to leave him at the hospital every night but I know that he is just too little to come home. When he is big enough, he will be home with me and we won't be restricted by any wires, tubes and monitors. I will be able to walk around and hold him and won't have to worry about him trying to pull out his feeding tube if it's not there anymore. I really can 't wait for that day. Until then, I have to keep visiting the NICU hoping the Dr finds him well enough to go home!
Thanks for reading!
-J
I must admit that that night everything was so surreal. By the time the Dr came in, got the low down on what was going on with me and the baby, and then decided we had to get the baby out because of his heart rate going down, I was already out of it. I don't know if it was lack of sleep, shock or if my mommy mode set in, but all I know is that I wanted to hear that baby cry and get out of me safely.
Everything happens so fast... they wheel you in, give you the epidural which kicks in pretty fast, cut you open, pull out the kid and sew you back up before you even realize that you are in the recovery room. I had even told my boyfriend that I don't remember getting from the OR to recovery then up to my room... all I remember is that I was a miserable mess that couldn't walk down to see my baby. That's all I wanted to do but I wasn't allowed till I was able to stand up.
Six PM I was allowed to see the baby which wouldn't have been so bad if I gave birth later than 4:13 AM. I spent all day crying because everyone that came to visit would get to see him and come back and say "oh he's so beautiful... you should see him". That was what made me so miserable. It did make me feel better to know that I was the first person besides the Dr and nurses to hold him for the first two days. He is the most beautiful baby I have ever laid eyes on, and still... after 20+ days I get teary eyed when looking at him because I can not believe that something to small and perfectly complete came out of me. At 2 pounds 11.4 ounces my little boy stole my heart and I fell in love. It's that mommy love... that's all I can say about it.
Since my discharge date, I have been in the hospital every day for several hours spending time with my baby. I have seen him smile and cry, have seen him move from a c-pap, to a high then to a low nasal cannula and now to just breathing room air. He has been gaining weight and is almost up to four pounds and is trying to keep up his own body temperature. All he has to do is master bottle feeding and then he will be out of the NICU!!
So far, the birth of my son has been an adventure. It started out crazy and has been going back to normal as the days go on. I can't wait to have him home with me- then I will really feel like a mom. It's hard to leave him at the hospital every night but I know that he is just too little to come home. When he is big enough, he will be home with me and we won't be restricted by any wires, tubes and monitors. I will be able to walk around and hold him and won't have to worry about him trying to pull out his feeding tube if it's not there anymore. I really can 't wait for that day. Until then, I have to keep visiting the NICU hoping the Dr finds him well enough to go home!
Thanks for reading!
-J
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